wednesday night geek-out

achieve cure

i've been reading and thinking and talking about our condition
not as christians
not as americans
not at caucasians
but as people
our people condition of selfishness and materialism. to me this lives somewhere between "going green" and "picking your nose." it's so popular and "in" that it makes me sick to think about but it's also something that no one wants to admit to because it's down-right embarrassing. to be selfish and materialistic is not something to brag about. while it may be popular to talk and hypothesize about how to achieve cure; i don't see alot of mass movement toward "going selfless." it seems like there are either people taking a vow of poverty or seeking a better paying career, bigger house, greater business profit or higher investment dividends; all in the name of being able to "give more money, open our home, support more people." (i actually don't know what "selfless" reason people give for the investment dividends)

but when i am driving home or trying to fall asleep, it's not the discussions or thoughts or solutions that bother me; it's my reason for desiring change in my life that really bothers me. the reason i want to help meet the need is more sobering than the need itself. the core reason deep in my heart is for me. my desire to be selfless and generous is actually very selfish and greedy. i want to change so that i feel ok with the way i am living. the reason i want to give to people and live simply and generously is so that i don't feel guilty about how i live my life and spend my money/time.

that's so absurd! even my selflessness is selfish.
it's even more selfish than my selfishness!!!!

or maybe it's a good thing?
maybe that's the only reason people ever change.
why would i continue to live contrary to my convictions?
i should feel good about the way i've lived at the end of the day, right?
maybe i should just be glad that i feel.
glad that i think about it.
maybe i should just change and quit talking about why.

the girls

Foster Weldon

no doubt a natural
already setting tennis fashion styles
already has a signature facial expression
showed alot of poise at the net
has already found a great pose that will surely land him on the cover of Tennis Magazine

but never took himself to serious
our prediction: a shoe-in for the 2024 olympics

takes me back

after a rousing conversation with brian and daniel the other night about materialism and stewardship and generosity and compassion...i took a walk down to my old stompin' grounds of West Chester U. Ah the days of parking my truck on Church St. and riding my bike all afternoon to class. Walking down the sidewalk in front of Main and hearing my name called just seconds before dave brindley's frisbee would hit me in the ear. Watching greg munz knock himself out running into that iron piece of abstract art in the quad. sweating over my drawing project since i couldn't draw. seeing my teachers face when i pulled my ceramics project out of the kilm and it was a mouse trap and a coaster set that still sits at my parents house in a box. trying to concentrate in my anthropology class as my teacher's three little boys ran around the classroom. trying to remember excel equations while my teacher stared over my shoulder. falling asleep in the study lounge. the smell of the pink hand-soap in the bathrooms. i miss those days. i miss that money i spent on those classes (mostly because i'm still paying it off). i miss those chicken ceaser wraps i used to get in the cafeteria. i miss jammin' with pete m. outside of burrito loco as drunk guys from the rat sang along after cru. almost makes me want to get my masters in undeclared.

UFO's

they were sighted
but i was not phased


serious though
where would our theology be then?
what would happen to that ethics policy i had to sign at work?
wouldn't everything slide down a few spots to make way
for the UFO coverage on TV.
I kinda wish it would happen.
there is nothing on TV!
save shear genius and project runway.

burrito monster

Sunday turned into a great day
A good friend
A good burrito
A good drink

wow!

they're still doing it.
they are still doing it.
they'r still doin it.
they are still buying it.
they're still buying it.
they'r still buyin it.

ryderz

http://www.kossan.se/roliga-filmer/synkroniserade_motorcyklar.htm

greener grass

recently i've been thinking about
photos
cameras
lenses
geeky stuff
i'm on this quest to be able to capture
what i see with my eyes
some things look better captured
and some things look better in my eyes
every once in awhile
while i'm perusing craigslist
or some gear-page
i notice how amazing my eyes work
whether you wear glasses or not
your eyes are the best lens you could ever imagine
sure they don't zoom or have metering options
but they are so clear and quick and alive
the colors are so vibrant
no panoramic camera can capture a landscape
like your peripheral vision

i wonder if someone could measure it
how much memory our brains have?
would it be like 1,000 terabytes?
or 10,000 petabytes?
or a zottabyte?

i think the one thing that amazes me
about photos/cameras
is the macro
they are by far my favorite pictures to take
because i can't see the little details
it can see those little flower stem hairs
and i love to see them!